New FREE VIDEO TRAINING session. Click Here to Watch This Video. DANGER PHRASE: “Our Policy.” Have you heard this or said this at work at the beginning of your sentences? Don’t make that mistake again. In today’s effective professional communication training lesson delivered by expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor, you’ll learn how to deliver “those messages” with tact, finesse, and professionalism using this simple 2-step process. Looking for more professional communication training or a motivational keynote speaker on communication or difficult people? Contact us to see how we can help. Click Here to Watch This Video. Want more videos? Check out our videos page.
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DANGER PHRASE: “Our Policy” Free Communication Training Video
September 20th, 2011 | by Dan OTags: Communication Training Denver, Danger Phrases, Denver, effective communication training video, On-Site Communication Training, power phrases at work, power phrases for professional communication, professional communication training
Professional Communication Skills Training From History
July 12th, 2011 | by Dan OThe written word is food for the soul. I’ve never picked up a book that didn’t teach me something (even if all it taught me was that I should immediately put it down). In my courses and training on all aspects of communication, I teach that communication is not all about speaking or writing; it is every bit as much about listening and learning. We can’t expect people to listen to us if we have nothing to say, or if we are not listening to what they have to say. Education is a life-long process, and books are one of the many tools that should always be at our disposal. Having said all that–I’d like to share with you a quote from my reading last night. It’s from one of the all-time master communicators and leaders of men–Teddy Roosevelt, commander of the infamous Rough Riders and 26th president of the United States. If you feel that you are struggling in the arena of life, doing your best, working your hardest, and yet constantly criticized, THIS QUOTE’S FOR YOU!
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
Are you looking for professional communication skills training made easy? Expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor just announced the release of his newest book Say This–Not That! This communication training resource gives you power phrases and danger phrases for use at work and at home. Say This–Not That! is available through Amazon.com in either hardcover or ebook form. Click here to see it on Amazon Are you looking for communication training or a motivational keynote speaker for your next event? Contact us to see how we can help.
Tags: master communicator, motivational keynote speaker, professional communication skills training, Say This Not That
Helping Yourself is Not Selfish; It is Life-Affirming
July 11th, 2011 | by Dan O
This morning I was reading the meditations of the Dutch spiritualist Henri Nouwen and came across something I want to share with you. Often we struggle with helping those around us until our energies are drained and we have no more to give. Sometimes difficult people drain our energies, and sometimes we are simply helping those we love until we feel we can help no longer. To prevent our own emotional and spiritual exhaustion, we must learn how to ask others for what we need of them. THIS IS NOT SELFISH. It is smart. It is right. It is spiritual. In the words of Henri Nouwen:
A Time to Receive and a Time to Give
It is important to know when we can give attention and when we need attention. Often we are inclined to give, give, and give without ever asking anything in return. We may think that this is a sign of generosity or even heroism. But it might be little else than a proud attitude that says: “I don’t need help from others. I only want to give.” When we keep giving without receiving we burn out quickly. Only when we pay careful attention to our own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs can we be, and remain, joyful givers.
There is a time to give and a time to receive. We need equal time for both if we want to live healthy lives.
Tags: asking for help, dealing with difficult people, dealing with stress, finding strength, healing ourselves, help, spiritual help
Dealing with Difficult Children Made Easy
June 23rd, 2011 | by Dan O
Most dealing with difficult people training focuses on difficult coworkers, superiors, or clients. One area often overlooked is dealing with difficult children, and yet that is probably the biggest challenge working parents face. The article below, taken from healthandgoodness.com addresses seven things parents can do to deal with children who are being difficult.
Dealing With Difficult Children By Karen Doherty and Georgia Coleridge
An excerpt from Seven Secrets of Successful Parenting
For more information about Seven Secrets of Successful Parenting by Karen Doherty and Georgia Coleridge (Bantam Press) see our website www.KarenAndGeorgia.com
Does your child ever get moody and uncooperative, answer back or have tantrums? Does he ever swear, throw things or kick you? Or refuse to do what he is told?
We’ve got eight children between us, and from interviewing hundreds of mothers and fathers, we know that even nice kids with loving parents can have toddler tantrums, teenage mood swings and everything in between.
Being a parent is so simple when your child behaves well. You talk nicely to him. He talks nicely to you. It’s easy. But when your child is rude or difficult, all the good parenting stuff can fly right out of the window. You can go from Super Parent to the Great Dictator in nought to ten seconds, yelling things you regret, getting no-where and then feeling guilty for hours afterwards. If your child is particularly temperamental, sensitive or headstrong, you’re probably in for a bumpier ride than the average parent, but all children have their off-days.
We’ve found there are SEVEN simple parenting skills that can make a huge difference when your child is being vile or refusing to do what you say.
What can you do when your child is being difficult?
To read more of this article, click here.
For more articles and ideas on making life better by communicating with clarity, make sure to subscribe to us on RSS, Twitter, Facebook, Youtube, and more. Are you looking for professional communication training, on-site training, or maybe a motivational keynote speaker? Contact us about your upcoming event.
The O-N-E Listening Tactic Everyone Needs: Body Language and Communication
June 21st, 2011 | by Dan O
Are you trying to improve your listening skills, or do you know someone who is? Body language, of course, is key in communication. With this one simple body language tactic, you can instantly transform into an engaged, active listener (the most important communication skill of all). Just remember O-N-E.
O-Open posture–maintain open posture when you are listening to someone–shoulders back and arms uncrossed.
N-Nod your head every now and then. A good nod every ten seconds will do; if you are constantly nodding it sends the wrong message.
E-Eye contact is good; too much eye contact is bad. Remember to glance away every 10 seconds or so, or you will start to creep out the listener. And don’t open your eyes too wide–this is a sign of psychosis.
Effective listening skills are part of any good professional effective communication training, and everyone can take a moment to practice this O-N-E listening technique. Furthermore, it’s something you can easily practice with your employees to transform your entire staff into listening experts. (more…)
Tags: body language techniques, communication training dallas, Communication Training Denver, On-Site Training, on-site training dallas, ON-Site Training Denver, Physical Communication and Body Language
New Say This–NOT THAT training video–DON’T SAY THIS!
June 2nd, 2011 | by Dan O
DANGER PHRASE: “Our computers are slow.”
Why would anyone say this? The only reason is that the person in question has never had effective professional communication training. In the next 4 minutes, you can improve your professional communication skills by learning a simple danger phrase (to eliminate) and power phrase (to use) brought to you by expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor. While you are waiting for the computer to pull up the information, you can waste the time–or you can use that time to your advantage. Whether you’re dealing with difficult people or a patient customer, you can cement your relationship with the caller by establishing a connection–not just any connection, but a Personal Emotional Connection–the P-E-C. Click on the picture, and Dan will show you how in this short fun video!
Tags: danger phrases at work, power phrases at work, power phrases for professional communication, professional communication skills, professional communication skills trainer, professional communication skills training
How to ruin a conversation with a man in just 4 words
May 24th, 2011 | by Dan O
The following is taken from our latest professional communication training resource, Say This–NOT THAT!!, due out in June.
If you’d like down-and-dirty tips for communication with your spouse or communicating at work, danger phrases, power phrases, and more, contact us, and we’ll alert you when the entire book is released.
The free resources for this book can be found in our customer resources section.
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Lesson 18
“WE NEED TO TALK”
Danger Phrase: “We need to talk.”
Power Phrase:
“(Person’s name), I need your help.”
Theory:
If your intention is to close down the lines of communication, the phrase, “We need to talk,” is one of the best ways to do it.
People–especially men–have connected so much negativity to this phrase that most of us literally have a physical reaction when we hear it. This phrase causes a strong bio-chemical reaction in the listener, and the lines of communication promptly shut down. Again, this has to do mostly with the association we’ve made with this phrase. I mean, no one in the history of the universe has ever said, “Honey, we need to talk. I just bought you a brand new car!” Never. It doesn’t happen. We all know what “We need to talk” leads to, and it’s not pretty.
When we need to have one of “those little talks” with someone, the first goal we should have is to open the lines of communication so the person is ready to receive the message that we intend to convey. The easiest way to do that is to use this simple 3-step process:
Step 1: Use the person’s name.
Step 2: Make the sentence short.
Step 3: Use “I” language. (Say something about you first–not the other person’s behavior.)
These three steps can be easily summarized and implemented using two different lead-in lines (“starter” phrases that help you get the words out):
Lead-in Line #1: “_____, I need your help.”
Lead-in Line #2: “_____, I’m concerned,” or “_____, I’m frustrated,” or “_____, I’m troubled.”
Furthermore, having a plan, and “scripting” out the first sentence of “those little talks” will help boost your confidence and effectiveness. If you start out weakly, the listener pays no attention to you; if you start off too aggressively, the lines of communication shut down. Using the 3-step process or one of the lead-in lines above will help ensure that you come off neither aggressive nor passive–but rather perfectly assertive.
For example, notice the difference:
SAY THIS–“John, I need your help.”
NOT THAT–“John, we need to talk.”
SAY THIS–“John, I’m concerned and could really use your help.”
NOT THAT–“John, you need to start carrying your weight around here.”
SAY THIS–“John, I’m troubled and I need your help.”
NOT THAT–“Listen John, we need to talk; you really messed up.”
Remember that the purpose of the lead-in to “the talk” is to open the lines of communication and get the person’s buy-in to your message. Our ego sometimes wants the other person to squirm at the beginning of the conversation. While this might temporarily feed our ego, it’s not the effective thing to do. If the other person is engaging in self-talk because of his concern about what’s coming—he will be listening to himself—not to you.
For example, notice the difference:
SAY THIS–“John, I’m concerned; we need to tackle a few problems.”
NOT THAT–“John, close the door and sit down.”
Quick reference card #18 in our customer resources section of the library
Could your entire organization benefit from on-site communication training? Expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor is now booking his fall schedule. Are you in the Denver or Houston area? No extra travel costs! Check out our course catalog, or let us design a program just for you. Contact us for more information.
Tags: communication in the workplace, Communication Tips, communications trainer, Danger Phrases, effective communication skills, motivational keynote speaker, On-Site Communication Training, Power Phrases, Professional Communication, professional communication skills training
How to Kill Your Small Business–Don’t Have a Professional Communication Plan
May 6th, 2011 | by Dan O
If you have a small business, one of the best ways to ruin your professional image is to NOT have a professional communication strategy. No matter how good you are at what you do, there will be people out there who also do what you do–and might not even be as good as you are–but who have a communication plan that leads customers to believe that they are more professional–and therefore more competent–than you are.
Don’t let this happen to you. With Professional Communication Strategies for Small Businesses, we can help you formulate a plan. The most common areas of communication overlooked by businesses are:
-Having a professional phone greeting– The phone greeting should contain 5 components (power tone, a hello, your organization’s name, the employee’s name, and an ending question) and should be the same for every single employee.
-Having a professional personal greeting–When greeting a customer at the door or in the office, all employees should be employing the gold standard for greeting and up-selling at the same time. For example, “Welcome to Shaggy’s! Would you like to wash your own dog today, or would you like us to do it for you–for only $5 more?”
-Having a professional email system (generally including auto-responders)–For example, “Thanks for your recent e-mail to Shaggy’s. We check our emails twice a day–at 9am, and at 5pm. We’ll be getting in touch with you then. In the mean time, if this is an emergency, please feel free to call us at 555-1212 for immediate assistance.”
-Having a streamlined up-sell strategy–For example, “How about a treat for the ride home?”
-Having an effective follow-up strategy–For example, giving customers a coupon on the way out the door that encourages them to come back within the next 30 days.
-Creating and maintaining a professional newsletter–For example, your customers should look at you as an expert, a source of knowledge, and someone who’s there to help them. So do that! Tell them things and give them things that help them, without charging them.
-Integrating the company message in all customer communications–For example, what’s your brand? You should be able to identify your company’s message from looking at any letter, promotional material, or product you have. Can you?
If you need help formulating a personalized communication strategy for your business and employees, contact us here and we’d be happy to get a quote right out to you.
Or maybe on-site professional communication training (the training comes to you) is what you need. If so, check out our course catalog, or contact us to tell us what kind of training you wish. We can always customize a training workshop to fit your individualized needs.
This message was brought to you by expert communication trainer, author, communication consultant, business consultant, and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor.
Tags: communication training for small businesses, expert communication skills trainer, motivational keynote speaker, motivational speaker, On-Site Communication Training, Professional Communication, professional communication training, professional image, professional writing skills, professional writing skills training
NEW FREE PODCAST: The Only Thing That Could Possibly Be Missing From My Relationship Is What I Am Not Giving (Part 3 of 3 in Relationship Series)
April 28th, 2011 | by Dan O
CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO TODAY’S FREE PODCAST. Part 3 in Dan’s Miraculous Mindset Relationship series. Today Dan discusses relationship principle #3, which is, “The only thing that could possibly be missing from my relationship is what I am not giving.”
Are you struggling with a relationship at home or at work? Using these three principles will miraculously transform any relationship in your life. Click here to listen.
Are you looking for a motivational keynote speaker on romantic relationships– or dealing with difficult people (basically the same thing, right?) Contact us and see how we can deliver the communication training or keynote you need while staying within your budget.
Tags: A Course in Miracles, inspirational podcast, motivational keynote speaker, motivational podcast, Relationships, Romantic Relationships
New Communication Skills Training Book Release: Say This–Not That!
April 26th, 2011 | by Dan OAre you looking for professional communication skills training made easy? Expert communication trainer and motivational keynote speaker Dan O’Connor announces the upcoming release of Say This–Not That! This communication training resource gives you power phrases and danger phrases for work and more. Say This–Not That will be released in may 2011. To be notified when this book is released, please contact us.