In this professional communication training series, communication expert Dan O’Connor teaches you how to polish your verbal patterns, get more out of every communication interaction, and sound like a CEO.
If you’ve engaged in any communication training, you have most likely already been taught that the word but is a danger word. But is it?
But is a perfectly acceptable word, and it’s one of the most commonly used words in our language for a reason. It sometimes negates what comes before it, but you should not be afraid of using it in the proper context.
That said, there are times where the word but is not appropriate, and should be purged and replaced with another word or phrase. Therefore, take out your Danger Phrase list and Power Phrase list, and write but on the danger side. Again–this is not to say it’s a Delete Phrase–just a Danger Phrase.
There are some phrases that should be deleted entirely from our verbal patterns: I love you but…is one of them. NEVER put a but after I love you, or anything else your truly want to emphasize.
When you are “watching your words” and trying to avoid using the word but in a phrase such as, “I value this job, but I can’t do that for you,” or “I want to help, but I simply can’t,” try using Power Phrases and begin your sentences with while or although–or you can even use a that being said phrase.
For example, if a polished, savvy SEO were expressing the above ideas, you’d no doubt hear something such as: “While I value this job, I can’t do that for you,” or “Although I want to help, I simply can’t” or “I want you to know I value this job. That said, I simply cannot do that for you.”
When your verbal patterns change, people’s perception of you change with them. Would you like to be seen as more polished, confident, and powerful? Start to speak the way polished, confident, powerful people speak.
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This professional effective communication skills training article is brought to you by expert communication trainer and Energy Vampire Slayer Dan O’Connor.
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